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Home Daycare

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Parent Resources

Building Self Esteem

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1. Reward children. Give praise, recognition, a special
privilege or increased responsibility for a job well done.
Emphasize good things they do, not the bad.

2. Define limits and rules clearly and enforce them. But do
allow leeway for your children within these limits.

3.Be a good role model. Let your children know that you
feel good about yourself. Also, let them see that you too can make
mistakes and can learn from them.

4. Teach children how to deal with time and money. Help
them spend time wisely and budget their money carefully.

5. Have reasonable expectations for your children. Help
them set reachable goals so they can achieve success.

6. Take their ideas, emotions and feelings seriously. Don't
belittle them by saying "You'll grow out of it" or "It's not as bad
as you think."

7. Help your children develop tolerance toward those with
different values, backgrounds and norms. Point out other people's

8. Give your children responsibility. They will feel useful
and valued.

9. Be available. Give support when children need it.

10. Show them that what they do is important to you. Talk
with them about their activities and interests. Go to their games,
Parent's Day at school, drama presentations, and awards ceremonies.

11. Express your values, but go beyond "do this" or "I want
you to do that." Describe the experiences that determined your
values, the decisions you made to accept certain beliefs, the
reasons behind your feelings.

12. Spend time together. Share favorite activities.

13. Discuss problems without placing blame or commenting
on a child's character. If children know that there is a problem
but don't feel attached, they are more likely to help look for a solution.

14. Use phrases that build self-esteem, such as "Thank you
for helping" or "That was an excellent idea!" Avoid phrases that
hurt self-esteem: "Why are you so stupid?" and "How many
times have I told you..."

15. Show how much you care about them. Hug them. Tell
them they are terrific and that you love them. Leave them love notes.

Reprinted from the National Parents Teachers Association (PTA).

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J-R. Daoust
Feb.10th, 2000

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Jane's Place Home Day Care!